Friday, 12 September 2014

Daddy's Job

     Coming home one evening after a long, hard day of work, all I wanted to do was plop down in my comfortable chair and relax. But my 4-year-old daughter had other plans. She enthusiastically met me at the door and wanted me to go outside with her and play. I tried to explain that Daddy was really tired and needed to rest awhile, but to her that was just not acceptable. I then suggested we could play a game in the living room while I sat in my chair, but as far as she was concerned, nothing short of running around in the backyard would do. A few more feeble attempts were made to reason with this less-than-patient bundle of energy, when finally in exasperation she exclaimed, "But Daddy, it’s your job!"
     I confess that she caught me off guard with such a profound statement, and my stubborn defense instantly collapsed. She was absolutely right. When I decided to become a parent, I accepted all the accompanying responsibilities, including my personal commitment to never neglect my family. This little girl needed to spend time with her daddy, and I had no right to deprive her of that basic need. With her simple and pointed words, she reminded me that love "does not seek its own" (1 Corinthians 13:5) and that all of my excuses were meaningless.
     Paul admonishes his readers to literally "redeem" the time they have been given (Ephesians 5:15). The word "redeem" means to exchange one thing for another, and since we have our children for only a limited period of time, how are we using that time and what are we exchanging for it? Surely providing for our families (1 Timothy 5:8) involves more than just material necessities. Am I providing love, security, a good example, encouragement, discipline, spiritual leadership, affection, affirmation, and undivided attention?
     To this day, whenever I am tempted to selfishly focus on my own perceived needs at the expense of my children or am distracted from my God-given parental duties, the words of that precious 4-year-old child still ring in my ears: "But Daddy, it’s your job!" That’s all the prompting I need to readjust my focus and get back on track.
     Thank you Lord for our children, from whom we learn so much!
–Kevin L. Moore

*Inspired by my oldest daughter Loren.

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Saturday, 6 September 2014

Spiritual Development in the Family

     No two families are exactly alike, and because of the imperfect world in which we live, God’s ideal for the home is not a personal reality for everyone. But irrespective of our particular household dynamics, how can we ensure that spirituality is being developed in our homes?
     I. Provide what is really important. “But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith, and is worse than an unbeliever” (1 Timothy 5:8 NKJV). Beyond the essentials of physical life (food, shelter, clothing), is there anything else the Lord expects us to provide for the members of our household? What about security, affection, quality time, undivided attention, and love? Do our children live in an environment where they can develop a healthy self-esteem (cf. Genesis 1:26-27; Mark 12:31), learning the significance of inner beauty (1 Peter 3:3-4)? Of even greater consequence, we must accept the responsibility of ensuring that our family is consistently exhorted to “walk worthy of God” (1 Thessalonians 2:10-12).
     II. Create an atmosphere of faith. From Deuteronomy 6:4-7 we learn three basic family guidelines. (1) Parents must exemplify faith (vv. 5-6). Our children watch, listen to, and imitate what we do and say. They pick up on our inconsistencies as well as our virtues. Whether our focus is on earthly or heavenly things (Colossians 3:2), our children will likely follow suit. (2) The way of the Lord must be taught in the home (v. 7a). As important as church assemblies and Bible classes are, the home is the central spiritual learning environment. Our children will learn their value system from somewhere, whether from the secular media, from misdirected peers, or from Christian parents. (3) We must make God and His will part of our daily conversation (v. 7b). It is never too early to begin talking to our children about our divine origin, righteousness, the Lord’s church, soul-winning, being a faithful Christian, marrying a faithful Christian, and preparing for eternity.
     Discipline is consistently practiced in a godly home (Ephesians 6:4) and must always be understood and administered in the context of love (Hebrews 12:3-11). Discipline, as God designed, is not merely corporal punishment but is appropriate action that encourages children to listen to and obey helpful instruction (Proverbs 13:24; 22:15; 23:12-16; 29:15, 17).
     III. Prepare for a family reunion in eternity. If one spouse ends up in heaven without the other, or if parents are there without their children or vice versa, what a tragedy! One’s own salvation should never be his/her only concern (cf. Hebrews 11:7). Granted, when our children leave home and are no longer under our authority and influence, they make their own choices and are solely accountable. But the general “train up a child” principle of Proverbs 22:6 ought to compel Christian parents to make sure that God is always first in the home. Families committed to the Lord will forever be together. 
     Developing spirituality in the family is no simple task in today’s worldly environment, but with God’s help and the right focus, let us be committed to this eternally significant endeavor.
--Kevin L. Moore


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Saturday, 30 August 2014

Preventing Divorce

     While our God is unquestionably a God of love (1 John 4:8), there are actually some things the Bible says he hates – among which is the termination of lawful marriages (Malachi 2:16). It goes without saying that God’s people must never teach or practice anything that would condone, endorse, promote, or encourage that which God hates. But what positive steps can be taken to prevent divorce?
     Divorce is prevented when spouses fulfill their God-given responsibilities toward each other. If every married couple respected God’s marriage law and followed God’s instruction manual, divorce would be non-existent. “Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband” (1 Cor. 7:3 NKJV). Husbands must love and honor their wives and be Christ-like leaders in the home (Eph. 5:23-33; 1 Pet. 3:7). Wives are to submit to, respect, and love their husbands (Eph. 5:22-33; Titus 2:4-5; 1 Pet. 3:1-6). Imagine how many marital problems would be resolved if every spouse was more patient, kind, humble, selfless, and trusting (1 Cor. 13:4-7).
     Divorce is prevented when children are taught, by example and instruction, to respect the institution of marriage and to view it as a permanent union. The influence of television, the movie industry, and our worldly society must be superseded by the good examples of Christian couples, the faithful instruction of Bible class teachers, and the healthy environment provided by Christian parents.

    Divorce is prevented when we encourage our singles to be faithful Christians and to marry faithful Christians. Granted, marrying a professing Christian will not automatically ensure a successful marriage, but when both partners share the same faith and the same commitment to a divinely-governed marriage, the odds are stacked considerably in their favor.

    Divorce is prevented when Christians study their Bibles diligently to understand the Lord’s will concerning marriage. Ignorance is not bliss when it comes to the will of God (Hos. 4:6). When discussing controversial issues like divorce and remarriage, it’s an easy cop-out to say, “Well, I haven’t really studied it enough.” While this may be a valid excuse for an immature Christian, there comes a time when a child of God must study this subject to the point he or she knows what the Bible teaches. It affects too many lives to be complacent and content with ignorance.

    Divorce is prevented when church leaders have enough conviction, courage, and concern to take a firm stand and publicly teach and defend the truth on marriage, divorce and remarriage. Jesus and Paul did not remain silent on this issue, even though it was as controversial in the first century as it is today. Teachers of God’s word will be held accountable both for what they teach and for what they neglect to teach (Acts 20:26-27; 1 Tim. 4:16; James 3:1).

    Divorce is prevented when Christians refuse to compromise with the world (Rom. 12:1-2). The devil succeeds when couples divorce and remarry contrary to God’s will, when unscriptural marriages are tolerated in congregations, when the word of God is ignored or twisted to accommodate sinful unions, and when brethren are led to believe this issue is unimportant. By exhibiting lax attitudes toward God’s marriage and moral laws, the church succumbs to the destructive influence of the world.

    Divorce is prevented when Christians are united on what the Bible teaches concerning this matter. Accepting a wide variety of interpretations and applications does anything but prevent divorce. If the “agree to disagree” mentality is allowed to prevail, unlawful marriages will continue multiplying in the church, generating more conflict and putting more souls at risk. Divided scholarship must never be used to justify disunity among brethren.

    In our attempts to prevent divorce – compassion, patience, and kindness must always be shown (2 Tim. 2:24-26). Confronting sin must never be done in a mean-spirited way, neither should our love for sinners induce us to tolerate or condone sin. We must speak the truth in love and restore the erring in a spirit of gentleness (Eph. 4:15; Gal. 6:1), while being careful not to forget our primary aims of obeying the Lord and saving souls.

–Kevin L. Moore

Originally appearing in The Exhorter (April-June 2000) and republished in The Summit Chronicle 6:1 (January 2008): 6. 



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